# Tags and beats > A speech tag tells the reader who is speaking. When it starts telling them how, it competes with the line it belongs to. Craft area: Dialogue. A lesson from Open Atelier. https://openatelier.co/lessons/dialogue-tags ## “Said” is nearly invisible **In one line:** “Said” disappears so the line can be heard. A showy verb asks to be noticed instead. Readers pass over “said” and “asked” the way they pass over commas. That is the point: the tag does its job and the attention stays on the words. Verbs like snarled, chortled or exclaimed ask to be noticed. Once in a while that is fine. Used often, they make every line feel performed, and they suggest the writer does not trust the dialogue to carry its own tone. **Before** > “You’re late,” she snapped. **After** > “You’re late.” She did not look up from the ledger. *Why it works.* Her refusal to look up carries the snap. The reader hears the tone without being told it. **Before** > “We could still make the ferry,” he enthused. **After** > “We could still make the ferry. If we run. If we leave the bags.” *Why it works.* The enthusiasm is in the rush of short sentences. The verb had been doing work the line can do better. **This one works** > “Again,” the drill sergeant barked, and forty boots hit the gravel. *Why it stays.* Barking is what a drill sergeant’s voice does, and the reader needs the volume and the snap to believe forty people obey at once. Here the verb reports a fact about the sound. **When to keep it:** Keep a strong verb when it tells the reader something the words cannot: volume, a voice that breaks, a sound the character makes on purpose. One in a scene can land. The trouble starts when every line has one. **Ask yourself:** Read the line without its tag. Does it still sound the way you want? If it does, the tag can be plain. If it does not, which words could carry the tone? ## Adverbs on tags **In one line:** If the line already sounds the way the adverb says, the adverb repeats it. If it does not, change the line, not the tag. An adverb on a tag usually patches a line that does not carry its tone. Read the line alone. If it already sounds the way the adverb says, the adverb repeats it. If it does not, change the line, not the tag. **Before** > “I don’t care,” he said angrily. **After** > “Burn it, then. See if I care.” *Why it works.* The anger is in the words now, so the tag can go. **This one works** > “Of course I’ll come,” she said brightly, and set the phone face down on the table. *Why it stays.* The adverb names the tone she is putting on, and the beat shows it is an act. The gap between the two is the point of the line, and neither would carry it alone. **When to keep it:** Keep an adverb when it says something the line contradicts or cannot show: a cheerful voice over bad news, a whisper in a crowded room. Then it adds information instead of repeating it. **Ask yourself:** Cover the adverb. Would a reader still hear the line the way you meant it? ## Actions are beats, not tags **In one line:** A character cannot smile a sentence. Write the action as its own sentence, after a full stop. Only verbs of speech can carry a line: say, ask, whisper, shout, mutter. A character cannot smile or shrug a sentence. Write the action as its own sentence. The punctuation shows the difference: a tag joins the line with a comma, a beat stands on its own after a full stop. A good beat does more than mark a pause. It shows what the speaker is doing while they talk, and that action can agree with the words or quietly contradict them. **Before** > “Of course,” she smiled. **After** > “Of course.” She smiled. *Why it works.* Same words, one change of punctuation. The smile is now something she does, not a way of speaking. **Before** > “I’m fine.” He nodded. **After** > “I’m fine.” He kept folding the same shirt. *Why it works.* A nod adds nothing the line has not said. The shirt he cannot stop folding tells the reader he is not fine. **This one works** > “Get in,” she laughed, already pulling away from the kerb. *Why it stays.* Laughing is a sound, and a line can be laughed out. Some editors still prefer a beat here, but a verb of sound that the voice can actually make is a tag, not a mistake. **When to keep it:** Verbs of sound the voice can make while speaking (laughed, sighed, sobbed) sit on the line between tag and beat. Use them as tags sparingly and on purpose. Actions the voice cannot make (smiled, nodded, shrugged) are always beats. **Ask yourself:** Does your beat show something the line does not already say? ## How many tags you need **In one line:** Once the turns are clear, readers follow who is speaking. Keep only the tags they need. In a two-person exchange, after the first few lines readers follow who is speaking by turns. A tag on every line slows the rhythm and adds nothing. Use a tag when the speaker could be unclear, a beat when you want a pause or a gesture, and nothing at all when the voices are distinct enough. If you remove the tags and lose track of who is talking, the voices may need more work, which is the subject of the lesson on rhythm and voice. **Before** > “Where were you?” Mira asked. > > “Out,” Joel said. > > “Out where?” Mira asked. > > “Just out,” Joel said. > > “With her?” Mira asked. **After** > “Where were you?” Mira asked. > > “Out,” Joel said. > > “Out where?” > > “Just out.” > > She set her cup down. “With her?” *Why it works.* After the first two lines the turns are clear. The one beat is placed where Mira stops pretending this is a casual question. **This one works** > “Who has the key?” said the inspector. > > “I do,” said the cook. > > “So do I,” said the gardener. > > “And I,” said the maid. *Why it stays.* Four speakers, each answering the same question. Without a tag on each line the reader cannot tell who claims the key, and that is the whole point of the scene. **When to keep it:** Tag every line when three or more people are talking, when a speaker could be mistaken for another, or after a long stretch of narration has broken the rhythm of turns. **Ask yourself:** Read the exchange without the tags you removed. Could you still tell who speaks each line? ## Punctuating dialogue **In one line:** A tag joins its line with a comma and stays in lower case. A beat is a sentence of its own. Readers rarely notice dialogue punctuation when it is right, and notice it at once when it is not. A few conventions cover nearly every case. A tag belongs to the sentence of the line, so the line ends in a comma inside the quotation marks and the tag starts in lower case: “Come here,” she said. A question or exclamation keeps its mark, and the tag still starts in lower case: “Why?” he asked. Start a new paragraph each time the speaker changes. A beat goes in the paragraph of the person who acts. A tag in the middle of a line sets a pause where you want one: “The trouble is,” she said, “nobody asked me.” Speech cut off by someone else ends in a dash; speech that trails away ends in an ellipsis. **Before** > “Come here.” She said. “Now.” **After** > “Come here,” she said. “Now.” *Why it works.* “She said” is not a sentence on its own. It belongs to the line, so the line takes a comma and the tag a lower-case letter. **Before** > “I was only going to—” “Don’t,” he said. “Not tonight.” **After** > “I was only going to—” > > “Don’t,” he said. “Not tonight.” *Why it works.* Two speakers, two paragraphs. The dash shows she was cut off, and the new paragraph shows who cut her off. **This one works** > “The trouble is,” she said, “nobody asked me.” *Why it stays.* The tag sits in the middle on purpose. It makes the reader wait a beat before the part of the line that matters. **When to keep it:** Some literary writers leave out quotation marks altogether, or use dashes in place of them. That is a choice for the whole book. Whatever you choose, use it the same way throughout. **Ask yourself:** Read the passage once looking only at the punctuation. Is every change of speaker a new paragraph? ## When another verb is right **In one line:** Some verbs carry information the words cannot: how loud, how quiet. Those earn their place. “Whispered” and “shouted” report volume, which the words alone cannot show. That is information, not decoration. Keep a verb like that when it tells the reader something they need. “Asked”, “answered” and “replied” are as quiet as “said”. Use them freely when they fit, though “asked” after a question mark is often unneeded. **Before** > “Don’t move,” he said very quietly. **After** > “Don’t move,” he whispered. *Why it works.* One plain verb that reports the volume replaces a plain verb and two adverbs. It is quieter on the page, too. **This one works** > “They’re in the next room,” he whispered. *Why it stays.* The whisper tells the reader the danger is close. No change to the words could carry that. **Ask yourself:** Does this verb tell the reader something they need and could not get from the line? --- The examples were written for this lesson. Try the check on a page of your own, in the browser, with no account: https://openatelier.co/#try